View from a Survivor:

Accepting Stroke

By Maria Erichsen



As I read the board, it is obvious one of the most difficult obstacles in coming to terms with acceptance is getting beyond that stroke can never be undone. We all deal with the normal process of grieving for the loss of what it has been taken from us. It seems, however, acceptance becomes more difficult for some as they search for the magic remedy to undo the damage.


After theyíve run the gamut with a willingness to go to any length at any cost, they come to the realization that the unfortunate truth is that there just is none. You donít want to hear it because you hang on to the hope that youíll wake up and this was just all a bad dream, but that wonít happen.


There are just some things in life you canít undo. If someone died, you wouldnít be trying to find a way to bring them back. Itís permanent and youíd know youíd have no choice but to accept it. Same with stroke, you really have no choice but to take what you have, work with it, and go on with your life.


This is not meant to discredit the many wonderful treatments and therapies out there, but there is a very big difference between tools that are a means to an end and the ones to which you pin your hopes to give you an immediate one shot fix. Thereís no a big secret being kept from you.


Itís like a diet. There is no magic pill. Recovery takes hard work and commitment. Youíll never be the skinny kid you once were, but youíll get there. SoÖ itís not 100 %. Just as much of your confidence came from the accomplishments you worked for prior to your stroke, allow your self confidence to begin with a clean slate perhaps reaping greater rewards facing a more difficult challenge. It takes a long time to recover. Itís a slow process.


Like dieting, everyone wants immediate results and gets discouraged when they donít see them. The diet industry thrives on this. Donít get caught up in it when it comes to your recovery, your mental health may depend on it. Delaying gratification is not easy. It takes hard work, commitment, and must begin with the groundwork of acceptance that there are no shortcuts to getting there.


If you still feel compelled to bite a bat, or compromise house and home to fly to some foreign galaxy for experimental treatment, please find a wi-fi hot spot and give us the low down. As your friends we donít want you to waste your money and energy, and would rather see it well spend focused on your recovery. Thousands upon thousands of members with experience will tell you thatís the only way to get better.


Copyright © June 2008

The Stroke Network, Inc.

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